It's Not A Dick !!!

There is something that women need more than anything else in the world.

 

And it's NOT a dick.   (But they DO come in at a very tight second !!)

 

This single item is vital to a girls survival.   She trusts it to save her, accompany her, retrieve her, justify her, be honest with her, lie to her, love her, hate her, hold her hair back for her when she pukes, and slap her upside the head when she needs it.

 

This is where a girl stores all her most precious secrets, and her most embarrassing ones.     Not even her husband or boyfriend ranks close.    And never will.  If she had to choose, the husband or BF will probably lose, hands down.

Some girls are with theirs all the time, or at least be within the same zipcode.  Some girls change theirs over the course of a lifetime, but will always have at least one at all times.   And some girls are lucky enough to have more than one.

Right now, I have TWO.  And there's a third lurking in the shadows….  One I've had since I was about 17, one lives right around the corner, and the other one is new with awesome potential !  LOL

Guys probably have no idea what I'm talking about.  The girls probably figured  it out at 'NOT a dick'.   LOL

 

I spent some time with my Numero Uno  BEST FRIEND last night.  She doesn't live here. She's 1800 miles away, but you wouldn't have known it.   I see her once a year.  This year I will get to see her THREE times and I can't fricken  wait !!!

Since I don't get to see mine every day, me and mine make a date, usually once a week or so.  We buy beer or wine.  We set a time.  We plug in our phones.  And we commence.

We 'commenced' last night.  Ugh !  Feeling it today, just a tad.

For FOUR HOURS !   And an entire 12-pack of Miller Lite.   (That's 1152 empty calories.  And 38 grams of carbs.   I can't eat for two days now !!!! )

(Is Wendy's open YET?!?!?    I REALLY want a 1400 calorie Dbl Burger with Cheese fries and a Coke ! –my comfort food)

So what DO Best Friends talk about?  I've been asked that before—always by men, of course.  LOL  What do you THINK we talk about !?!?!?   HELLO !?!?! 

EVERYTHING !!!!     

Mostly sex.    

 

 

AND

 

 

(and of course, our other girlfriends, and their boyfriends or husbands) 

Last night we covered anal sex and getting tied up.  Oh, and sex with another girl.  (Two of these are MY ideas………can ya guess which?)

    

      

          

Anyways, before I get sidetracked by sex, my favorite subject, …..

Best Friends.  Girls HAVE to have them.  To us, they are like the air we breathe.  We trust them with our deepest, darkest secrets.  We trust them with our kids and our boyfriends/husbands.   We trust them with our lives.

They do not judge us.  They do not lie TO us.   

They will bail our asses out of any jam or jail.  They will lie FOR us.

Girls LOVE their best friends.  We love them as much as we love our own sisters.  They ARE our sisters.  Girls are IN love with their best friends.   And they are not afraid to show it.   (Especially after a few cocktails !!)

 

Never think that you will prevail in a fight with best friends.   You will ALWAYS lose.   It's a war you do NOT want to be a part of. 

I love my friends.  There is NOTHING I wouldn't do for my friends.  And I can't wait to see her in person again !