it’s just SEX, people !!!

It’s human nature.  Granted, it’s sole purpose is to procreate, but God gave us the tools to enjoy it, as well.

Men require sex to be pleasureful in order to spread the seed to make  baby.

Clitorises.  Their SOLE purpose is to provide pleasure.  We don’t necessarily NEED one to enjoy sex or achieve an orgasm, but I think I’ll keep mine, all the same.  Thank you very much. :)

But I’m done procreating.   The baby-making machine has been placed into permanent retirement. 

The love-making machine, however is in full working order and is still employed, indefinitely.

Alas, I’ve been informed that I am not allowed to contract out my love-making machine, lest the financial support for the assumed owner of  said love-making machine shall cease to exist.    Designated Financial Provider has firmly stated that he does not  SHARE  his(?) love-making machine. 

(HIS machine?  I don’t recall an exchange of 50  goats and a cow for ownership of this machine????)

FINE.   GRRR.

But let’s go there anyway……..cuz you know I will go there !!

(I am going to put this in first person, only because it’s easier to formulate ideas and get my point across.   Besides, this makes it more personal and I hope you can relate to the objective of the whole thing. )

I am married.  And I entered into a commitment with a single individual for the expected life term of  “til death do us part.  “

Yada yada yada

However after eating at the same restaurant every day for a few years I want to change up the menu just a bit? 

What’s wrong with the current menu I have?  ABSOLUTELY NOTHING !   I love it !!  I adore it!! It’s fulfilling.  It’s satisfying.  And it’s delicious.  But it’s the SAME all the time.

You ask “Why not introduce something new and different ideas to the current menu?”

What if the current menu refuses to change things up, --no ifs, ands or --butts?    (tee hee-- Pun)

The offer to bring in an additional ‘chef’ is refused. 

The offer to get some new ‘utensils’ is refused.

I can’t even get chef to vary the location of the meal.

So, herein lies my predicament.  I am forced to be presented  the same meal for the rest of my life.  No recipe alterations.  No adding of any spices.  No changing up of the presentation. 

Exact. Same. Dish.  Every. Day. Til. One. Of. Us. Croaks.

I also seem to  be fed only when the chef is hungry.  I have all but stopped waving him down for fear of the restaurant being closed.   AGAIN.  

Very frustrating.   And after awhile one starts to feel kinda dejected.  (Even tho I know the chef doesn’t mean for me to feel that way.)

Don’t get me wrong.  He’s  feeding the need, but not satisfying the underlying hunger. 

And as time goes on the hunger becomes so powerful that it starts to consume me, starts to feed off my mind.  I become ravenous. 

People like this are not looking to have an all out affair with someone.  They are  not looking for a week long fling.   It’s just sex.  Nothing more.

They are not out to break up marriages or homes.  And they are not looking for it to be a habit or an adopted routine. 

Only their significant other can make love to them as no one can.   And they are NOT looking to replace them.

Be they men or women, it really doesn’t matter.    Some can be happy with what they have, and will tolerate it for the belief that they are not to step outside ‘their restaurant’.   And that’s okay.  More power to them.

However, there are those that need to get out of the soft pastry section and step into the mosh pit of hard rolls.  

If the Significant Other is unwilling or uninterested in trying a hard roll, what then?

From the female point of view, guys !   We LOVE the soft and gentle touches, the music, wine and candles.  It’s all good.

But damn it!!   Every now and then we want to get thrown up against the wall and fucked like you don’t know my name AND I owe you money!

If what they want ain’t on the home menu, eventually they will order drive-thru.  Might only be a one-time thing.   Might be once every couple years.  But it WILL happen. 

Girls,  same thing.  You gotta  step outside your comfort zones once in awhile.   Slob the knob and take it up the ass every now and then.  

No one every died from swallowing.    And your butt will only hurt for a little while.   

Christ, if you can drop  an 8 pound kid out of your cooch you sure as hell can take on a 6 inch rod in the ass. 

And get off your back and on your hands and knees.   If you don’t want your chef tossing some other chick’s salad you best be providing your own ingredients at home.

So, let’s say one chose the drive-thru route.  What now? 

Guilt?  Maybe.  Consequence of the game.  Either swallow the guilt or deal with the aftermath of spilling your guts.

Remember.  It’s just SEX.  NO emotional attachment or commitment to the other party. 

But I’m betting that after tasting the drive-thru, the home menu looks even MORE delicious than it did before.